Setting boundaries with your mom to address her making you feel for enjoying time with your dad is important maintaining a healthy relationship Here are some specific boundaries you could consider setting:
1. Clear Communication: Clearly communicate to mom that you appreciate her concerns but that you also love spending time with your dad, and it's important for you to have positive experiences with both parents.
2. No Guilt-Tripping: Let your mom know that you will not tolerate being guilt-tripped or emotionally manipulated for spending time with your dad. Clearly express that this behavior is hurtful and unacceptable.
3. Respectful Discussions: Encourage open and respectful discussions where both of you can share your feelings without resorting to blaming or shaming each other. Set the expectation that conversations should be constructive and focused on understanding each other's perspectives.
4. Personal Autonomy: Assert your autonomy and right to make decisions about your relationships with both parents. Let your mom know that while you value her input, the final decision on how you spend your time should ultimately be yours.
5. Healthy Boundaries: Establish boundaries around topics that trigger conflict, such as discussing your time with your dad. Let your mom know that you will limit these discussions to avoid unnecessary tension and foster a more positive relationship but that you expect her to get help for her issues and not put pressure on you.
6. Support System: Inform your mom that you may seek support from a neutral third party, such as a counselor or family member, to facilitate discussions and mediate any conflicts that arise concerning your relationships with your parents. Tell her that you wish to have privacy and the ability to relay your feelings as you see them and not to try and influence your feeling or emotions.
7. Time for Yourself: Communicate the importance of having personal time for yourself where you can focus on your own well-being and interests without feeling pressured or judged by either parent.
Remember, setting boundaries is about asserting your needs and feelings in a respectful manner. It's crucial to stick to your boundaries consistently and reinforce them if they are not respected. By clearly defining your limits and expectations, you can promote healthier interactions with your mom and minimize the emotional strain caused by conflicting parental dynamics.
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