In countless family court cases across the country, the same pattern emerges: a parent is pushed out of their child’s life by one-sided narratives, ignored evidence, and a system that seems more committed to maintaining control than mending relationships.
One of the most harmful examples is the “therapy before parenting” trap, a tactic routinely used by court-appointed Guardians ad Litem (GALs) and therapists who claim to be neutral but whose actions reveal a much different agenda.
It starts like this:
The GAL insists that the alienated parent and child cannot have any communication, no texts, no phone calls, no visits, until they attend therapy together. The parent, desperate to reconnect with their child, agrees. They attend every session. They follow every rule. They jump through every hoop. And still, they’re told, “Not yet.”
The therapist makes a recommendation based on the damage they are witnessing happen to the parent and child’s relationship even with the parent’s complete compliance. The therapist tells the GAL, the child’s therapist and the child’s other parent that it’s imperative for the child and parent to meet outside of therapy. But instead of supporting that recommendation, the GAL stalls.
Weeks go by. Then months. The parent asks, “Why am I still not allowed to see my child?”
The GAL replies, “Because you haven’t spent any time together outside of therapy.”
Yes, you read that right.
The same GAL who denied outside contact is now blaming the parent for the lack of outside contact.
It’s a psychological trap. A legal gaslight. And it happens far more often than people realize.
The damage isn’t just procedural, it’s emotional.
Children begin to believe their parent doesn’t want to see them. That their parent must be dangerous or defective, because why else would the court limit contact? The alienated parent is left powerless, watching their child slip further away under the guise of “therapeutic intervention.”
And the professionals responsible? They deflect, delay, and deny.
This is not reunification.
This is court-ordered alienation, cloaked in clinical language and buried beneath bureaucracy.
If a parent has complied with every directive…
If a therapist has recommended more time…
If a child has expressed interest in reconnecting…
Then withholding parenting time is not about safety.
It’s about control.
And it’s time the courts start holding these professionals accountable, not just for what they do, but for what they prevent.
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